My unlikely friends

This is the first time I have posted using my phone. Forgive me for the mistakes I’m sure I will make! 😄

This year I am so thankful for my many friends. These last few years it seems, I have added some very important people to my list. I have a bestie that’s 80 yrs old, 2 “most unlikely” young men, and I still have the many friends I’ve had throughout the years. Below happened yesterday that made me really think!

I had a wonderful conversation with my “most unlikely” friend. He said some things that have never been said to me. The things that he shared with me didn’t happen overnight but it was a result of being invested in his life over a couple of years. I share this because I want you to know -it is SO worth learning and loving people who may be different than my other “likely” friends. These are not exact quotes but are remembered as closely as I can.

•You helped me to open up and to share my feelings and opinions.
•You say to me, I’d love to hear more about that. Or what was it like? You gave me a voice to say how I feel and not how you want me to feel.
•You make an effort to involve me in your conversation and not just talk to me but to listen.
•I have learned how to communicate better with others.

What I HAVE LEARNED in 2 “most unlikely friendships” with 2 young men is:

•Being willing to try and ride the waves as they come.
•Making sure they feel validated and knowing it’s ok to be who they are. Not trying to fix them, but to support them in becoming all they can be.
•And most importantly is to educate myself about the differences we each have.

I Do Not Like That Kiss!

Do you know how it feels to be kissed yesterday and killed with another kind of kiss today?  Let me explain just how that happens.

If you have lived very long you have realized there are two things that will separate your real friends from the others: adversity and money. When one or the other comes into the friendship, our true friends will be there to uphold us as they have consistently in the past. Those who are not-so-true will either leave or suddenly become distant.

The very same thing happened to Jesus. He was close to twelve men that He chose to be His disciples. They all claimed that they would never forsake him but they did. Even worse is that one betrayed Him with a kiss. Jesus knew and He asked, ” Judas, betrayest thou the Son of man with a kiss? Luke 22:47-48

Proverbs 27:6  “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”  Usually we get that “gut instinct” when someone is faking their friendship but we just don’t want to believe it! … Or in other words – we are being “kissed by the enemy.” As much as we hurt when we realize it, keep in mind it happened to Jesus too. When the actions of our friends appear to be one thing but they have hidden intentions, then we are being “kissed by the enemy.”

When you are “kissed by the enemy” then their true feelings are revealed about you. When you don’t respond to them the way they want you to, you find out what they really think about you. Many will run down the list of your flaws and throw the secrets that you have shared with them back in your face. It used to grieve me and cause extreme pain. I would cry and feel horrible and guilty as if maybe I somehow caused this. My heart would close down and I would make vows that I would never let another person inside to hurt me. In the past, I have lost trust towards people and become bitter and withdrawn. As I have grown spiritually, I’ve learned that this is life and to trust my own God given instincts. Not all people are who they say they are!

I pray that I always treat people with the upmost respect and integrity regardless… of how many I have been “kissed by the enemy.”