God. God?

Posted: May 24, 2012 in Soul Care, Team IWNQ (I Will Not Quit)
Tags: ,

Flooded with emotions of pain and anguish all I wanted to do was cry for hours.  But crying is something I don’t do much anymore. My wounded heart would become beyond exposed.

—     One attack. A sting of pain.

—     Two attacks. Horrendous pain.

—     Three attacks. The absolute depths of devastation!

I’ve been completely enslaved under a mound of mental torment. “My boys, my precious boys. NO! Not another one…God NO! Please, I’m begging, You, PLEASE!” Those words I cry out over and over. Never ending it seems over the last year.

What do we do with all of the pain when it becomes unbearable, causing us to feel we can’t take another piece of that shard jagged glass that is being stabbed deep within our soul?

—    God has promised …_________

—    God has promised…__________

—    God has promised…__________

God?  God?

He’s there.  I KNOW, I know, I just know in my heart He’s there!  My boys are alive but barely. But I’m still struggling with 1,000’s of broken pieces of my heart.  There is No sermon, No bible scripture,  Nothing that is healing the aching stab in my heart that I suffer within.

God is holding all the pieces of my heart. I just know He is. Right, God?  Every tiny fragment He knows where they are. There have been so many wounds for so many years. These wounds are just too deep.

Time heals all wounds? Please don’t tell me that.  I think… we just learn to cope and live with our wounds.

Thank you God for those few special friends that understand me!

Thank you God You sent me precious dogs to comfort me at this time! I know you understand this.

His word tells me that God has promised to ….

You fill in the ________.

I will try to remember what was stored in one of the pieces of my heart.  I promise Lord, I’m trying.

Psa 34:18 The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart;…” Psalms 34:18.

~Jen

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